PARENT COACHING WITH TOM
“Children are tyrants. They contradict their parents, gobble their food, and tyrannize their teachers.” Socrates 470-399 BCE.
Children challenge us, teach us, and change us. Parent education tends to focus solely on the needs of children. We talk about what is best—for them—as if we are not important. Parenting is a journey moms, dads, and kids take together. We are all growing up and learning something new. We forget that the best educators are often right in front of us. Kids are little, but they grab you attention better than any schoolteacher!
We just need to listen to them.
But, childhood has it’s own language and can be hard to understand. I’ve been studying this language for nearly 30 years and see how conflict is mostly just misunderstanding. Parents need to believe their child has something to say, be willing to listen, and try to understand. This can be pretty hard to do after years of confusion and conflict—but it is not impossible.
As a parenting coach my job is simply to help you understand what your child is saying and learn how to say things your child understands. Awareness will not make parenting challenges go away. New questions, new conflicts, and new opportunities are always the next step. That’s OK. We don’t want the struggle to go away. Parenting is not easy, but nothing truly fulfilling ever is!
Every child and every parent is striving towards the same goal—independent adulthood. I’ve devoted my career to helping kids and parents work together to meet that goal. As a parent coach, I help parents identify fears, patterns, and perspectives that hinder communication and understanding. By helping let go fears you have for your child’s future, I help open space to see a child for who they are right now. A child who feels seen, heard, and appreciated as they currently are has no need to demand attention, engender conflict, and drive you crazy.
When parenting feels like a burden, your child feels like a burden to you. It does not need to be that way. Childhood should be fun and so should parenting. As a parenting coach, I want you to have fun again. Both you and your kid deserve that!